


Everlasting.

by orphan_account



Category: Larry Stylinson - Fandom, One Direction (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-02
Updated: 2014-07-02
Packaged: 2018-02-07 03:38:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,252
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1883901
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account





	Everlasting.

_This is my note._

_Not just any note like, pick up these items from the grocery store or dentist appointment at ten. No, my note is the note. The one that everyone does not want to see. Everyone except the one writing that said note._

_You see, this note is like no other note you have read, seen, or heard of. It comes close to many others, but I can reassure you that these are my own words and thought being poured out onto this page. They are different and they are true._

_Before I really get into the real, soul purpose of this note, let me start with when I was younger. You could have looked at me and thought that I as a happy kid in a happy, loving home. Honestly, I was. I loved life, and life loved me. Everything was great, so happy and bright. I had tons of friends and a family who loved me. I was taken care of with great care, and I was really grateful of it. I wasn't doing bad in any of my classes, in fact I was one of the smartest students in class, if I say so myself. Things were doing wonderfully, but that all changed once I started grade nine. This was the year I concluded that I was gay. I didn't think anything wrong or dirty about it. I was attracted to the other boys and that was it. No one knew until one day I had mustered up enough guts to tell my crush that I liked him. I had expected the best, but I had gotten the worst. He was, and as far as I know still is, homophobic. He beat me up that day. And the next. And the next. And so on. Lets just say that I didn't have a crush on him anymore. I always hid the bruises he had given me just so that my family wouldn't see. Except one day after school when it was time for him to beat me, a teacher had caught him. To make a long story short, he told the teacher that I was gay and 'that was wrong'. The teacher didn't seem to care much about that, but he called my parents to ask if they knew what was happening. That was the day that found out that I was gay. They yelled and scolded me on how it was wrong and how I must have been doing it for attention. They began to question me on how this happened and they wondered why and how I was gay after how religious we had been. I told them it's not something I decided, and there is nothing to be done to change it. They tried to get past this, but I know that to this day that they still find me repulsive. Anyways, all throughout the last four years of my schooling, I've remained to be bullied and teased and occasionally beaten up. Graduating from a different school then I grew up at was a blessing. I didn't have all those judgemental people taunting me. In 2009, I had auditioned for The X Factor. It was one of my best, but worst decisions I have had ever made. I got on, met the love of my life, ended up in a band with him and three other lads, and now I'm in one of the largest boy bands in the world, One Direction. Don't get me wrong, I love singing and preforming with these guys, but this band has a secret, that a lot of people know of. but it's tearing me apart. When I mentioned meeting the love of my life, I forgot to mention that since we are one of the worlds biggest boy bands, we can't be public and we cant have freedom and we cant love each other. For he is the 'womanizer' Harry Styles, and I am the 'loyal and dedicated boyfriend' of Eleanor Calder. Many fans have noticed the small things that Modest! Management can't cover up. They call us 'Larry Stylinson'. Anyways, I am literally falling to pieces having to lie about what's real, and I'm sick and tired of having to cover things up and not just letting things be as they should. They are taking me away from Harry and I can't take it anymore._

_Now this note wasn't just to tell you my life story. This note is one of those notes to... say goodbye. These are my last words, and they will be the most important words I say. Do not take them lightly and do not take them as a joke. This is serious and this is important. If you're the first to read this, I hope you're Harry because I feel like Harry should be the first to really understand._

_I have been sick. Not physically, but mentally. You couldn't see it because I hid it rather well. I have been unhappy ever since the time I heard that you and I can't go public. The words still rattle my bones. Everyday it just got worse and worse and the more I needed you, the more they'd push us away. I love you so much, I'm sorry if you couldn't see it as much as before, but honestly you're everything I think about. You're the only reason why writing this note hurts me so much. I am sorry, and I really hope you forgive me. I love you forever and always and I hope you do the same. I want you to know that none of this is your fault. You're so brave, Harry. That's different with me. I am weak. Weak and afraid. I can't go on like this. If you're looking for me right about now, let me tell you to stop. I'm not around. I'm not sure where I will be, but I will for sure not be in our apartment._

_I love you, Harry._

 

This is the note I read over and over again. Trying to figure this out. So many messages and meanings are bursting through this piece of writing. This is the last form of contact I have with Louis. I had gone out today and he was here. Everything was fine, but when I got back.. No Louis. Just this note in his place.

I put the note down back onto the end of the bed where I had found it. I took out my cellphone and dialled in Louis' number. It kept ringing and ringing until it went to voicemail. I left a message asking where he was before I hung up and called Niall. It rang a few time before he answered.

"Niall, are you busy?"

"It's two in the morning. I was sleeping, but I guess I'm not busy now. What is it?" His voice was groggy and sounded extremely annoyed.

"I need you to get Liam and Zayn so all of you can meet me here. Please, I'll explain when you all get here. And make it fast, it's urgent." I sounded obviously stressed and worried.

"Okay." Niall said before he hung up.

I sat on the living room couch, gripping the note, time flying by as I wait for Liam, Zayn, and Niall to arrive. Sooner than later, they had made it here. All three looked pissed off and tired.

"Alright, Styles. What was it that you've woken us up at two that's so important?" Zayn said, looking the most annoyed.

"It's Louis. I left today for hanging with friends at a club and I got back and I found this. I-I don't know what he means. I'm thinking he's left me." I passed them the note. "I mean it says goodbye and that he won't be around, and he doesn't know where he'll be. I think maybe he was leaving me and went to go drink. I just don't know!"  My voice was riddled with anxiety and pain.

All three boys had passed around the note after reading and they gave it back to me. They exchanged looks before Liam suggested we go and look for him around our part of town. Like, all the pubs and bars and such. We all agreed and left Lou's and my apartment.

Frantically we began to search around town, in and out of pubs and stores. As we walked, spaced out quite a bit, I decided to give Louis' cell another call. No answer still.

"Harry." Zayn called to me. He was a long ways behind me. "Harry did you just call Louis?" His voice was stern.

"Yeah?" I looked back to him. He looked scared and grim. "Zayn, what is it?"

 A pause filled the empty streets.

"I found Louis."

He raised his shaky finger and pointed into an alleyway. I took a few steps towards Zayn, regretting every one. I didn't want to see why he was so distraught. I kept walking. I needed closure on this. He had said he found Louis. I stepped close and closer until I could see what Zayn sees.

 

 

He found Louis.

 

And now the truth of the note hit me. It was a suicide note, and I am staring at the body of my dead soul mate. I can't breath and I can't move. The situation seems to be going right over my head because this seems all too pretend for it to be real life. I must be dreaming. I must. This can't be happening. Louis can't be dead, he can't be. Louis couldn't have shot himself. No, he couldn't have. He was happy and he loved me and I loved him and everything was going to be perfect and ...

In those few seconds it look my to think of all that, I had fallen to the ground. Tear flowing down my face. Everything numb, but still managing to feel this pain. My stomach bringing me to a point of throwing up. My heart having inconsistence patterns of beating to fast to hardly beating. My eyes fading out to black, but clearing up again just to see the image of my precious, darling Louis laying limp in front of his blood that had been pouring out of his head, and that had been sprayed onto the wall. His eyes open, but glazed over. It's all too much. And there is nothing I can do, but cry and call 999.

I crawl over to his freezing cold body and I pried his hand open to take away the gun that had ended his life. I proceeded to hold him in my arms for one last time. I didn't care about the blood getting on me. I held him tight just like I used to, and just like how I always wanted to. I wanted him to hold me back, but he wont.

"Wake up, Louis. Please, oh please. You can't do this to me, please. Oh god, oh god, oh god. Please come back.." I spent every minute I could, holding his frail body tighter and tighter. Tears of mine were soaking his shirt. What happened now 'til whenever the police and ambulance showed up was painful to experience. My mind had went to some flashback to all the times of our relationship that I could remember. The last one that stayed was a moment of Louis and I holding each other just like now, and all I could hear was our heartbeats and the silent humming of Louis. All I could smell was his shampoo. All I could feel was his soft skin against mine. This moment of heaven was ripped away from me as fast as I was ripped away from Louis' body. I could still feel and smell and hear the moment just prior, but instead of seeing the dream, I'm watching as medics are shouting to load him onto the ambulance. I've been reaching out for his body and I've been yelling his name. Tears had been pouring down even faster when I realized that this has been the last time I will ever see him, let alone hold him.

My world literally had crashed and burned right in front of my own eyes as I watch as they drive him away. Out of a moment of desperation, I jolt up and I start to chase to ambulance. My knees were far too weak to keep up, and I collapsed in the middle of this empty road. My sobs and calls for help only got louder and louder. My shouts of pain and agony were to only things to be heard on this block, and I can only assume for the next two blocks.

I was left alone for minutes, until Niall, Zayn, Liam, and the police came to pick me up off of the ground. They had taken me to the police station for questioning and comfort, but all I wanted for comfort would be for Louis to walk through those front doors. Although I know it's impossible, I just keep praying for him to be alive. My prays fail, of course, and I keep on crying for what feels as weeks. I'll never ever be the same. I've lost the one who meant everything to me and I've got nothing left to live for. So tonight, I will be writing my own unique note for others to find. A note of two lovers who would, and do, go to the worlds ends to keep their love everlasting.

 


End file.
